you of little faith

Last night I dreamt that I was drowning. I got out of a small wooden boat, took a few steps on the water and then suddenly sank and found myself under the water struggling to make my way back to the top. All I remember thinking as I raised my hands up to the surface was, 'Jesus aren’t you going to save me?'

This morning as I thought about the dream I couldn't help but think how relevant it was. Yesterday I had a day where I felt like Peter at the point in Matt 14, when as he was walking on the water towards Jesus he saw the wind, became frightened and began to sink. As I continued to think about the dream today, I couldn't help but wonder why Jesus would let me sink and then grasp and struggle like that? Clearly I was like Peter and didn't have enough faith to stay on the water, but would Jesus let me drown? I honestly found myself to be quite angry.

After stewing about it all day, I finally turned to Matthew 14 tonight, to see how Jesus responded to Peter's lack of faith:
Peter said to Him, "Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water." And He said, "Come!" And Peter got out of the boat, and walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But seeing the wind, he became frightened, and beginning to sink, he cried out, "Lord, save me!" Immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and took hold of him, and said to him, "You of little faith, why did you doubt?" Matt 14: 28-31

Jesus immediately took hold of Peter when he called out to him. Peter didn't even go beneath the water. Jesus caught Peter without delay. That was a good reminder for me that even though my faith seems to be dwindling here day by day and it feels as though I am sinking, Jesus will not let me drown. I have called out to Him over and over and I know that He has already stretched out His hand and taken hold of me .

Clearly my dream is an apparent reflection of my current depletion of faith. How is it that I would come to believe that Jesus would let me drown like that? Now that I have been reminded of the truth, that Jesus has a hold of me and will not let me drown, I guess that leaves me to answer His question:
"You of little faith, why do you doubt?"